In the business of parenting, most of the advice is similar: It’s about staying calm, being consistent, not spanking or punishing, and how we need to replace it all with “time out.” Isn’t “time out” punishment? And–whose problem are we solving anyway? The parent’s? The child’s? I also questioned this: Is there really a “one size fits all” solution to the challenge of discipline? We are all mothers and we all love our children, but do we want to raise them to be the same person?
We all come from different cultures, with different stories, and we have different sensibilities and sensitivities.
Temper tantrums are normal
In my conversations with parents, they all seem to worry that something is wrong with their child if s/he experiences a “meltdown.” Well, an adult acting out a temper tantrum is unusual, and an older child’s tantrum is also different from a young child’s.
But for young children, temper tantrums are the only way they can express their negative feelings fully. They do not know what these feelings are. They have no words to describe them, nor can they delay their expression. So, if you feel worries or anxiety around temper tantrums–rest assured that your child is all right, and you need to change your perspective.